Been sitting here staring at these for 20 minutes straight. Torn between wanting to get better and not wanting to do anything at all, wanting to just stay curled up in bed for the rest of my life.
Is this what my life has become? Taking pills just to get through the day? Not living, just surviving.
I feel like there’s no reason for it. No excuse.
I haven’t had a shitty life. I haven’t had a spectacular life either. But I can’t even remember the last time I felt happy about where I was in life.
Yeah, I feel happy in a situation like playing with my dog, and it makes my mood a little better, but it doesn’t make me feel happy about my life.
I feel like I’ve accomplished nothing with my life and that I never will.
I dread getting out of bed every morning. I find myself hoping that I won’t wake up, just so that I won’t have to deal with the day.
Every day feels like I’m fighting a loosing battle.
But the fact that I’m still here, does that mean that maybe I’m not loosing the battle?