Chronic Depression Fatigue

I found this article very interesting because this is something I seem to be struggling with a lot. My depression is still ongoing, but I had a few months where it did lift, before it came back more severe, and I was still tired. Less tired than I had been and far less tired than I am now, but this side of it did seem to linger. I thought it was simply the medication making me tired, but part of me wondered, and still wonders, how much was actually my body causing it and not the medication.

There is no reason I should wake up every morning feeling miserably tired. There is no reason I should regularly find myself so tired at work that I’m fighting my eyelids closing. There is no reason I should have to down cups of coffee to stay aware enough to make it through the day.

This is how I feel every single day. This past week, before Christmas, I had one day that was particularly bad, I almost asked to go home. And I’m on reduced workload and hours right now. But this one day, my brain and body were falling asleep every few minutes, for a split second, until my head started to fall and I’d wake up right away. One of thos times, it actually happened while I was in the middle of typing a sentence. When I woke, I looked at my computer screen and just before where my cursor was sitting, I had apparently typed, “tttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt”. I realized my finger was now resting lightly on the T key. I do have the vague memory of lifting my finger slightly as I woke. Based on how many Ts were on the screen, I couldn’t have been out for more than a second. I kind of laughed, but I was still so out of it, I didn’t fully process what happened until a few hours later. It feels almost like a dream now.

I feel less intelligent than I used to be because I always feel as if I’m barely awake.

That is something I have definitely been struggling to remind myself is not true.

What It Feels Like to Have ‘Chronic Depression Fatigue’
By Olivia James, Contributor, The Mighty

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